Lately my self-esteem has gone down the drain. Aside from the whole Kim situation, there's just been moments where I feel small and insignificant, kinda like Russel. This isn't only mental because I know I've shrunk in body size.

I stopped working out on a regular basis in November 2008. Since then I haven't really gone to the gym consistently. It's always been a spur here and there but it's obvious I'm not as committed.

The first time my good friend Matti and I met was during the camping trip in the summer of 08 when I was shirtless for practically two days. When we hung out for the second time during spring break. I was wearing a tank-top, wife-beater, a-shirt, whatever you wanna call it. She told me I looked scrawny. I thought she was joking around or being mean like how some girls are; specically like a Lisa Kong. I thought nothing of it.

Then one day, I was on the phone with Matti when I decided to ask her if she really meant it. She said, "Yeah, you're like 1/2 the size you use to be." Lol, I didn't cry or act emo or nothing but this did affect the way I see myself sometimes.

Just letting you know.